meh

I don’t think I’m cut out for this casual thing… I did meet a cool guy yesterday, M–k, he came up from Kansas, he’s in the military. He’s originally from California, so he’s pretty bored. It was great and Mo loved him… but he’s three hours away. I wish I could find someone here in Lincoln… M–t is apparently not interested in me anymore.  I asked if he wanted to hang out this weekend, but he said he didn’t know if he had the gas to come down. I offered to give him gas money (I did before, but he declined, saying it wasn’t fair. But I would have to pay for gas if I went up there.) He hasn’t answered, and I know he’s online and chatting with someone else. It’s his loss. I thought we had a lot in common. Good luck finding someone like me. 

I could have hooked up with some other guy from Omaha, but I went out for a power walk earlier, and since I haven’t been getting much exercise, it wore me out. So I am laying on the couch watching The Tudors on Netflix. There’s a lot of sex in it, since it was originally on Showtime. Some hot British dudes — Jonathan Rhys Meyers and Henry Cavill. Mmmm.

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I am sooo bad…

*** warning– this post is explicit***

As I said in my last post there were 2 guys I was interested in… the one in Beatrice, A—–, finally texted me last Thursday wanting to know if I was free. The one day that I had plans, to go to Kearney with the parents & my sis. So he thinks I was blowing him off, haven’t heard from him since. The other guy, B—-, finally texted me and said he had been in Vegas for a friend’s bachelor party. Meanwhile, I met M—, from Omaha, we had a very naughty email exchange, and he came down Friday afternoon and we had awesome sex, he’s very dominant and likes to play hard… after he went back home, we had another steamy text conversation, he was possibly going to come back Saturday night. Meanwhile, B—- wanted to hook up, but I had a few qualms about being with two different guys the same day, plus I had so much fun with M—, I just wanted to get with him again. B—- assumed I was blowing him off and got mad and said he wasn’t interested anymore. I sent him an apology but didn’t hear from him again. It didn’t work out for Matt to come down, and Sunday morning B—- texted me. Long story short, he came over, we f*cked, he left. It was good, but nothing compared to the encounter I had with M—. I know it’s not fair to compare, but it’s true. B—- likes my tits, M— likes my ass. Why couldn’t it be the guy in Lincoln who was the amazing f*ck? M— came down again last night just before 10, he was going to stay over, but I said something about how I needed to get serious about job hunting in the morning, and since he’s looking too, he decided to go back to Omaha so he could get an early start on job hunting too. I was disappointed, but oh well. Hopefully we’ll hook up again. I don’t know if I’ll hear from B—- again, I guess I should give him a another chance, as it was it was too much like being with E—. Damn, I really like M— and would be willing to be exclusive with him, but of course he doesn’t feel the same way. I know he’s contacting other women on the site, because it tells you when someone is online and chatting. If we were closer in age, I’d be his perfect match, he wants a short curvy girl he can dominate. He’s like my late husband in that he wants his dick sucked constantly, and that’s one of my skills since I always had to work so hard on N— because of his ed. But it’s worth it because I get mine as well, unlike with N— because most of the time he couldn’t keep it hard enough long enough to get me off.

I figured out a fundamental difference between guys and girls. If a girl has a choice between two guys, one she knows is a good f*ck, and one she hasn’t been with, 9 times out of 10, she will choose the guy she’s already been with. Guys, on the other hand, will chose the chick they haven’t f*cked, because they know they’ll get off either way, and they want the unknown. That’s why it’s so hard to find a guy to have a long-term FWB thing with, because as soon as some new pussy presents itself, they’ll go for that.

love stinks (yeah yeah)

I think I may just get a really good vibrator and forget about trying to find a guy. Apparently, I am only attracted to flakes. Every time I get contacted by a guy I’m interested in, they go all hot and heavy and then disappear. There were 2 guys from a hook-up sight I was interested in, one from Beatrice and one from Lincoln. The first guy kept telling me how hot I was so I gave him the email I use for those sites, and he asked me for a bunch of pictures and kept saying how much he wanted to f*ck me. I sent him my #, and I haven’t heard from him. The other guy, who I’m actually more attracted to, messaged me 4 times before I responded. He left me his #. I texted him Sunday night, he kept saying he was looking forward to meeting me, and I haven’t heard from him either, I texted him twice asking if he still wanted to meet, no answer. Men on those sites always complain about what flakes women are, the one guy even said if you weren’t interested in actually meeting him, not to bother. He’s the one that pursued me, and he seemed nice enough. Why is it so hard to find an attractive guy? I guess attractive guys don’t need to troll dating/hookup sites.  I know this seems really shallow, but I’m not attracted to 90% of the guys who try to contact me, or they’re in Omaha or somewhere else. I really want a guy here in Lincoln because I’m not going somewhere else. They’d have to come to me. I’m just in selfish mode right now because 16 years of it being all about someone else’s wants and needs was enough.