crazy

Haven’t posted for a bit… I’ve been playing, meeting random guys, some I liked a lot, some were ok. Of course the ones I liked were the ones I didn’t hear from again… but the good news is, I’ve finally found someone to make me forget M***.  The only thing is, he’s 21… I am older than his mom :/  We didn’t meet on the internet, he was a friend of a friend, we all got together for drinks one night… then my girlfriend and I had him and our mutual friend (who’s gay) over to her house for dinner.  Originally, my girlfriend was kind of interested in him (she’s 49)… but it became clear over the course of the evening it was me he was attracted to… at first I didn’t encourage it, but when my friend said “go for it” I did. I showed him a bunch of my naughty pictures.  Then I gave him a ride home and he didn’t seem interested in going any further, so I just dropped him off and went home.  

I texted him that maybe I was wrong, but I thought he was attracted to me.  He said he was, he just had a migraine… so we started trading pics.

He called me the next day to see if we could get together, but I was busy, but I knew I would see him again because we were all going out for drinks again. He picked me up in our friends’ Mustang (a gay guy with a muscle car, go figure) and was showing off, and it just felt fun. Later after dinner, we rode back to my girlfriend’s house in her car and waited for our other friend to pick us up… while we were waiting in the alley, he pushed me against the wall and felt me up, then took my hand and slid it down his pants… it was so fucking hot.  Then our friend showed up, they took me to my house to get my car. I was supposed to meet him at a motel where he was staying while he was waiting to move in with another friend… we had sex and it was pretty good, then just hung out watching tv, til he needed to sleep and I went home. 

The weird thing is, other than him being 21, he’s also into country music, which I thought I hated… but I’ve been listening to it, and I really like it.  Underneath my realist facade, I am a hopeless romantic and so much country is love songs… I even want to learn to line dance. We went out to country night at a local bar, and people were having so much fun.

Anyway, after than first time I didn’t hear much from him, but I knew we were all going to Omaha the next week, so I knew I’d see him… on the way back from Omaha we sat in the back seat together… we’re just sitting there and he says “you should check your phone” which I thought was weird… but he had texted me wanting to know if I would give him head… I texted back “they’ll see” but he said they weren’t paying attention. So I did.  God, I sound like a total slut… 

Anyway, our next hook-up came about because he had said he would fix my timing chain for half what my mechanic wanted… at the time I wanted it fixed so I could go to Omaha to see M—… I made dinner for him and his roomate as a Thank You… and all night I kept noticeimg him staring at me.  His roommate when out to drive my car to make sure it was working, and R— grabbed me in the kitchen and told me to go to the bathroom… he followed me in and bent me over the counter… and it was totally fucking hot.  His roomate came back, the seal wasn’t tight on the engine and it was leaking, so he called his dad, and between the three of them, got a new seal and put it on, but it meant I had to leave my car there overnight. His roommate and him gave me a ride home, and I went to bed.  2 am R— called me to tell me he had really wanted to spend more time with me that day, but couldn’t with his roommate (who also happens to be his best friend since childhood) around, but that he would make it up to me. He said he liked me alot. Before he hung up, he said “Love you” … which threw me, but I said “Love you too” … and I do, actually.

Next night he called me around 10 and told me to come over around midnight.  Apparently his roommate was going to be gone for the night (to clarify, I am also friends with the roommate, who is gay)… so I did, and we had amazing sex… he had asked me if I would let him put it in my ass, and originally I said no, because I didn’t even let my husband do that (except a couple times when we were first married)… but he was so sweet about it, I let him, and it didn’t even hurt much because he’s so good… So we’ve seen each other almost everyday, the roommate thinks we’re just friends who go drinking together, because R— does like to drink and says I’m the only one of his friends who likes to go out and do stuff… since his roommate is gay (and 22) he doesn’t find me attractive, so apparently it doesn’t occur to him that R— would.  We have sex as often as we can when the roommate isn’t there… which is mostly during the day, so when I get a job that’ll be out.

Last night was crazy… he got off work a little after 1, bars close at 2. We went to a place that serves kamikazes … I had one, then he wanted to do shots of Rumple Minze, I did one, then it was time to got. I thought I just had a buzz on, but by the time we got to his place, I was trashed.  The roommate wasn’t home, we started messing around in the car, then went in the house and spent the next couple hours fucking like crazy, at some point he ripped off my panties, I’ve got bruises all over, and a bite mark on my ass… he fucks like a machine.  I ended up sleeping there, when his roommate came home I just said I was too drunk to drive home. 

I went home to feed my cat and shower… talk about the walk of shame, driving home at noon with no panties 😉  and then I went back because he had asked me to…

So…. I don’t know what this is… I know I love him, I also know it’s not probable that it’s going to get serious, given our age differences.  He says that doesn’t bother him, but it’s a fact that can’t be changed.  I can’t imagine his mother would be thrilled… only a couple of my friends know that we’re anything other than friends, and they’re sworn to secrecy.  All I know is I am having fun for the first time in a long time, and the best sex I’ve ever had.  So even though I know in the end I’m going to get hurt, I’m willing to take that risk…